Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Through It All...I Believe!

This past month has been an emotional roller coaster.  I am well aware that my feelings control me at times and I lose my focus, but it has just been a lot to stomach.  My brother has been having severe migraines for the past month.  Since he had a brain tumor several years back, this is always concerning for our family.  He has been unable to work for nearly 4 weeks and in bed most of the time.  His strength was gone, and holding his head up for more than practically two hours at a time was more than he could handle.  Seth is such a hard worker and I knew this was all SO HARD on him!  Many tests were ran and doctors were seen...only to be told they could not find the reason behind his pain.  He was on so much pain medicine that functioning normal was out of the question...

Life is starting to get back to normal.  That is almost hard to say as you don't want normal to mean that days for your family will no longer include laughs, conversations or smiles shared with someone they loved.  On August 24, I received news from Seth that his sister-in-law passed away unexpectedly that evening.  Seth was already going through so much and now they were feeling another blow.  Seth's wife is nearly 34 weeks pregnant with their second baby, trying to take care of Seth and now has to deal with the sudden loss of her sister and the shared responsibility of her sister's children.  Natalie is so strong!  I went and spent several days with them and all I have to say is, God knows what we are facing and He knows when to bring strength and peace.  

God allowed us to be a support to Seth and his family during this tragic time.  His presence has never felt so real than when I sat in the funeral service and sang, "Here Is Here" with the congregation and heard words of love and support declared through a difficult situation.  

Through of all of this Seth was not getting any better.  We had to come home and that 11 hour drive was harder than being there in the middle of all of the chaos.  I just wanted to be there and help or support their family.  Thankfully, this past week, Seth has been able to get relief.  He has little strength and he can easily overdue it and end up with a headache, but we are thankful for the relief that God has given him!  I have never felt so helpless than looking on their recent situation and knowing I couldn't take away their physical or emotional pain.

I'm so glad God can bring comfort that 'man' cannot understand or provide.  Even with the distance between us, I can rest assured that their family is 'being taken care of'!  They have so many decisions to make and feelings to process...all I can do is pray and have faith.  Pray for Seth's continued progress and that he will be able to work and pray for comfort and wisdom for a family that is aching from loss. 

So...dealing with all of this has caused me to take a step back.  Posting about my outfits has seemed highly trivial compared to what was really going on around me.  I know this is heavy for a public blog, but I've shared quite a bit about my life over the past years.  I've learned that people that do not know me personally actually still care about the concerns that I'm facing.  The new 'normal' is returning and life is settling down some.  Fall activities are quickly taking over my calendar and the anticipated arrival of 3 new babies in our family is making for some fun times together again.  Yet, just because moving on seems like part of life, I don't want to forget.

A thought to leave you with...
There are five things in life you cannot recover: a stone after it's thrown; a word after it is said; an occasion after it's missed; time after it's gone; a person after they’ve passed. Life is short... break the rules. Forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile. Enjoy Life!  (One of Tyra's last post on Facebook)


11 comments:

Jen Alexander said...

Thank you for sharing your heart. I'm so thankful for a God that truly never fails and always provides grace right when we need it! He is faithful. I'm thankful that Seth is starting to feel some recovery. Praying with you!

Constance said...

such an awesome post. We have been praying for ya'll alot. even in church for the past couple of weeks. Pray that God continues to help and give the strength. Keep us updated about your brother.

monster cakes said...

What a touching and heart breaking story. I'll keep you and your fam in my thoughts and prayers! And I bet your positive attitude is a light to your family in such a dark time. Good for you.

Peggy said...

so sad to hear this news Leah. Praying for Seth and Natalie and you and your family. So true, we just never know the future and must be prepared to meet God!

Brittany-Trends250 said...

Wow Leah, i'm glad you posted about this. I am praying for your family, and for your brother. It's so hard to see your family go through hard times, and i think it's times like those where we understand the atonement so much better. He is not only there for us when we need forgiveness, but He also is there for us in our sorrows. I hope that your brother improves, and I am so sorry he is going through this.

becoming teacher misty said...

I'm sorry you and your family have been going through such a time of sickness and loss. I pray that your brother continues to be relieved of his migraines and that his wife finds the strength and support she needs. You all sound like such a loving a supportive family.

Brittany said...

My heart is breaking for your family! We will praying for all of you. It's so hard to watch those we love go through suffering. So thankful for a God to lean on in tough times!

ALICIA said...

I just want to tell you that I think you have awesome parents! Natalie is a lucky daughter inlaw! I dont think I once saw your mom sit down the many days I was at the farm, and then you guys got there and your dad jumped right in with her. I appreciate all your family has done for our family!
PS: I have gotten the giggles several times thinking about Madi tooting on your lap(many times) at the funeral...and your look like, I did not do that!

Tonya said...

Excellent post! I don't know you personally, but wanted you to know that our thoughts and prayers are with all of you during this difficult time! Will also be praying for your brother--I can't imagine having migraines all the time! Praying that you will feel God extra close during the days ahead!

Stephanie said...

Leah,
Thank you for sharing...the pain must be almost unbearable at times. You all are in our prayers, and we will remember your brother, as well. I met Natalie at Jenn's wedding, after following her blog for a couple of years. She is so sweet. Didn't know that your brother was dealing with all those issues in addition to the tragedy. So thankful that our Heavenly Father cares for us more than we can imagine. We can take comfort in that!

Liz said...

Leah,
It was good to see you at "the farm" in KS - I was a little strung out talking to the girls and making sure my kids weren't crazy, and I didn't stop to say hi. But I was so glad you all were there for them at that moment.
Love,
Liz